Let's talk this over, its not we're dead.
Was it something I did, was it something you said?
Don't leave me hanging in a city so dead.
Held up so high on such a breakable thread.

Chorus:
You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could BE
You were everything, everything that I wanted.
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it.
All of the memories so close to me just fade away
All this time you were pretending.
So much for MY HAPPY ENDING

You've got your dumb friend and know what they say?
They tell you I'm difficult but SO ARE they.
But they don't know me, do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me, all the SHIT that you do.

Repeat Chorus

Its nice to know that you were there.
Thanks for acting like you care.
Making me feel like I was the ONLY ONE
Its nice to know we had it.
Thanks for watching as I fall.
Letting me know we were done.

Repeat Chorus

Avril Lavigne = My Happy Ending

______________________________________

Saturday, April 15, 2006

4:10 AM

hMuahahha… blogging time again… just came back from London… just left my dearest fren and came back to Newcastle… haiz… we had a peaceful time… these past 3 days… din really talk A LOT… but just seeing her and being together again feels really good..

12th April:
I had difficulty sleeping… but I was supposedly to get up early for my 11am train.. but I was still tossing and turning around… and then I send a fren a text.. I told him I couldn’t sleep cos I was tooooo excited.. haha then he text back say… just close ur eyes and relax… sleep will come soon…. Next thing I knew was the alarm clock ringing… and I was on my way out…

By the time I reach the main gate of the hostel, I knew I won’t be able to walk the whole way to the central station, which is normally a 15 min walk… my bags were too heavy… I took the metro loh.. 2 stops onli… then on to my train.. a peaceful 3 hrs down, slept abit.. did abit of work… then reach around 2plus…

Then I bought my ticket and went on to the designated hotel.. I got directions for lancaster gate hotel, but I knew it was wrong.. I tot it was thistle Kensington or something..then lewis gave me some direction… and I ended up trudging through all the way with my 2 heavy bags and reaching thistle Kensington gardens… and waited in the lobby… and then… jiun text me and said the hotel was the one she stayed in last time.. tara copthorne!!!!

*faint* so I went to the receptionist and ask her the nearest tube station.. she told me is lancaster gate.. I almost wan to faint again… I ended up asking the concierge to hail me a cab.. (btw he was kinda cute and very friendly) then I paid 6 pounds… to get one whole round over the bloody Kensington EXTENSIVE gardens to the correct hotel…

After I got settled in, we met up with lewis to have dinner at TGIF… not bad loh.. quite nice food.. spend about 20 quid each.. bill is 100 pounds… -_-“ then by the time we finish is around 9plus then we quickly go get tickets for some musical.. as we have already decided we didn’t wan to go to stonehedge the next day… ended up buying Phantom of the opera for 46pounds per person… *xin tong*…. Then Ashley was tired, so she went back hotel sleep, me and jiun went to eat ice-cream… hehhe

13th April:
Slept until 10ish? Jiun woke up like 5am… she always the early riser.. I’m the lazy pig.. we went to ‘malaysian hall’ for Malaysian food… me, Ashley, Christine and jiun.. then was talking about all their stories from SIA… their experiences… some farnie some sad… but overall very interesting…

Then we went SHOPPING!!! Hehe.. walk down bond street to oxford circus.. then walk until 4plus then we tired le.. decided to go back and get some rest before the play at 7.30pm..

The musical was really.. quite… awe-inspiring.. really good stuff… the movie was actually based exactly on the theatre show… but the real live singing and everything the sets and the costume everything was really nice and well-rehearsed.. obviously cos running for 20years le…didn’t regret my money … cos I really like this show also…

After that we went to get ice-cream cones to eat on the way back… then so farnie.. cos when we arrive at the tube le… Ashley keep asking can eat here?... then I replied.. this is not Singapore.. no fine de… nobody will ‘catch’ you.. ahhahaha I told her the first month I came over I also keep looking out for signs and notices got indicate can or cannot eat in certain places… apparently only Singapore sooooo concerned that their citizens won’t behave that they have to implement fines for everything…. -_-“

14th April:
Last day in London, I slept quite late… cos I stayed up and watched a show called ‘when a man loves a woman’ starring Andy Garcia and Meg Ryan… so nice… and I cried and cried… then I went to do my work until 3 plus… then slept… the next day I was too lazy to wake up and I ask jiun to go out with Ashley loh.. then I slept until 1 then got up and did my work, watch telly… then dilly dally… until 4 when teresa came to get her mahjong set… we talked for an hour or so then jiun went back to sleep abit… by 7 she was ready and we went downstairs loh… and said goodbyes and I left …. Feel sad… but its better than CNY that time.. cos now I left 20 days to finish my dissertation then… 2 months to grad day and then can fly home le!!!! Now… MAIN THING IS TO FINISH MY DISSERTATION IN TIME….

Right.. better go now..

Leafie's Happy Ending

2:10 AM

Hmm.. didn’t realize got ppl can be so similar … in terms of experience.. was reading someone else’s blog the other day.. and realize wat she have written is like.. wat I have experienced too.. on different guys la.. but the feelings ..the constriction is still there…

She talks about reciprocated love, wanting so much to be his fren, wanting to be able to talk to him and have fun together as FRENS… yet there seem to be so many invisible obstacles blocking them.. but from wat I know, I think its really true that woman are from venus and thus use their hearts to think.. no matter how much we try to deny it, we will get emotionally involved even when we swear, promise, cross our heart, no matter what still will involved our heart into any forms relationship.. and therefore comes the broken hearted stuff…

I had enough bruising and enough broken pieces of my heart mended and told myself I will not get my heart involve the next time... yet... it still happens… EVERYTIME..

It is true that ppl call women the weaker sex, vulnerable, the crybabies and other stuff relating to our ineptness when it comes to men… but there goes the saying, cant live with them, cant live without them. (applies to both sexes)

This was supposedly to be posted last week, but I couldn’t seem to get my bloody blog to work….. have to wait get someone else post for me -_-“

Somebody say i never update blog again... so important meh?? sometimes dunno what to write ma.. then i one shot write few days one, cheat abit loh...

where did i left off?... hmmm.. 5th april? kkk

6th April 2006:
thursday... slept at home... woke up do work... sleep... and overslept (classic pig)...oo, alsmost forgot i did went out.. for my dance... @ 6pm.. then me and Melissa, my new found-lots in common frend.. we went to M&S get grocery and then sat in BK to chit chat until 10ish before we were chased out...

7th April 2006:
Supposed to meet my supervisor at 12pm. But as fate decreed it, my alarm clock suddenly stopped working for an hour... i dunno wat happened but it was delayed for an hour, so when i woke up, my alarm clock showed 11 yet my phone show 12.... so i missed my meeting... never.. i just have to get my dissertation in by 5th May.

8th April 2006:
waited until 6ish to get out of the house and head for the 'Malaysian Night' thingie in the student union. Serene say got 'surprise' = she danced. best of the lot as i can see. Was rather enjoyable, then headed out to have a drink at some pub and finally spent like 7 pounds getting into Blu Bambu to club... (xin tong... tong... tong... tong...)

then came home ard 3am.. then Bengy dear call me ask me go Angel of North the next day... alright loh

9th April 2006:
lazed in bed until 12pm.. then got up and get ready to go to meet Bengy. Erm, when we got there the wind hor blow until the bone want to freeze over... but got some nice picx... got snow again... *miracle* cos its SPRING TIME yet its still snowing...

then we came back and went chinatown eat my fav food: 'bo zai fan'(canto) ... yummy... then me, bengy, jon, serene wan go watch movie ... ICE AGE 2.. cute loh.. then jon call ryan and chloe also..

then i kept make fun of ryan cos we 'caught' him with francesca strolling the streets when we were eating lunch.. hahahaha then he just fake fake like never hear.. hehhe
i very bad... !!!!

so we finish watching and went home.. i was quite tired by that time.. but i didn't get to bed till 1am...

10th April 2006:
Wasted my whole day sleeping again.. wanted go town buy didn't go in the end... wan to do work still haven started.. and here i am writing my blog.. then have to plan for tomorrow, need to wash clothes, go town get food for wed.. cos wed go london... hmm... gotta write it down.. later forget... then call lewis and kah ming when i get to london... have to call jiun ask her wat time she arrive...

so many thing to do de.... better go le.. start some work on my dissertation else left less than 20 days to submission le....

Leafie's Happy Ending

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

6:48 PM

Been struggling for the past 2 days to get my drama over and done with. I slept from 8-12 on sunday night and i was up the whole of Monday fo 24 hrs, slept for 7 hrs, up and going for the whole of tuesday and din sleep until 4am last night.

And then i suffered from this serious lack of sleep.. and i couldn't wake until 6pm today... realli realli bad... i was suppose to go for a meeting, go move the drama props and a millions things.. but i selpt thru it all... i even got swollen eyes from lack of sleep.. damn... i just hope i can finish up wat ever i can for is603 and is 607 by thursday... and then at least have another thing or two out of my head

i was realli realli proud of my drama members... erm.. not exactly 'mine' but.. in general.. all of them did great last night... chloe and gemma got cards for them and flowers before the show... and me, chloe and gemma got cards and flowers off them after the show... it was realli realli heart-warming...

and we got the news that drama soc has been nominated for top 5/56 societies in northumbria uni... which is realli amazing considering we only have 30+ members and barely just put on a production since 5 yrs its been established.. come to think of it.. did i realli put that much effort in? chloe did i guess.. but me? hmm... and i guessed it realli mattered that 3 of us did contributed one way or another to the production.

just realli glad that its out of the way and i can focus on my dissertation over the easter break and get it done asap.

Leafie's Happy Ending

Thursday, March 30, 2006

3:50 AM

LOVE THIS GAME!!!!

Leafie's Happy Ending

Friday, March 24, 2006

4:08 PM

Went clubbing on tuesday night... came home, bathe... did some work.. slept at 5-6am in the morning. Got up ard 3pm? then sat in front of my computer... din do much.. check some mails.. help serene edit a song.. but then got problem saving it... promise samira i would help her read her report... then i need to get my bloody dissertation done by next tuesday...

got ready for drama at 430... then i reached at 4.55pm.. no one was there.. (as usual) then waited... ppl flowed in ard 5++ but not enough ppl for any acts... so we waited for a half hour before we could do something...

Act I - so far so good

Act II- getting there

Act III - still alot of pace stuff not flowing

Act IV - ppl with scripts on stage...

we are putting this up in less than 10 days time.. and they still have thier scripts.. and i gotta act as well as direct...

i heard this quote saying.. by some director or something.. i think its mel gibson.

" if you're going to buy alot of hats, please get more heads to wear them"... hey i'm jus a normal kid you know.. there is so much i can do

but anyway... they are jus so.. lazed out.. (some not all) and i realli dunno wat could get them moving.. some might think they play a small part and might not be important.. but still.. THEY ARE NEEDED... but they dun see it that way...

so after the rehearsal... chloe had a talk with them... asked them if they really wan to go on stage... and we will stop everything if the actors themselves were not putting in more effort..she finished and never let me get a chance to speak to them about the attendance.. and dismissed them.... fine

so i was walking home...and always... always after drama.. i have so much tots running thru my head... if i tried for once not turning up for practice.. wat would happen? if i say i dun wan to do this job now... wat will happen..? if i weren't there to hold these ppl together... where are we now?

but i dun think i can ever voice that out... my dad said.. never ask wat ppl do for you, but wat you can do for them... yes i did my part.. but if they don't do thiers... why am i so bothered ? right.. so they're not paid to do this.. neither am i ... they jus have to come and read thier lines... i gotta direct them and i did the script.. i gotta 'shout' at them to get in place.. i have to go to every rehearsal, i have to come first go last... but .... fine.. jus let it go... nothing tooo un doable..

the main thing is.. i'm in my 3rd year when they are in the 1st or 2nd... so supposedly who's got the most workload?

i'm jus being bitchy... i mean.. i asked for this .. i know it was coming.. and i know i can handle it... but... sometimes its just sad that nobody appreciates it...

the only thing that i really realli hope for.. is next year... this time.. when they are putting on another show.. they might remember me then.. and give a thought to wat it was like... and by the time they are in year 3 they might really understand my position.. and get amazed by how i did wat i'm doing now...

Leafie's Happy Ending

Saturday, March 18, 2006

6:51 PM

PS.. PS... long time since i blogged...

Was really excited today, cos Paul told me he got his 'Qube' mp3 player from Dixons yesterday so i planned for an outing to get it too. Slept at 10ish woke up at 2am last night. Then fall back asleep around 6am. Then met up with serene early morning to walk about Eldon Square before meeting Benjy & Jon to go Metro Centre.

So we all very excited to get our 'Qube' but .... things din turn out as expected... Cos the dixon's ppl said it was sold out and they will not be ordering in any more stock!!!! WAT!!!!

So we are were quite.... sad lah... disappointed cos couldn't get it. Then just lepaked around, have a VERY VERY VERY not so nice lunch of fish and chips...

Then we amused ourselves at the indoor amusement park.. before continue to lepaking around... then i finally bought 3 music score books: Kelly Clarkson, Phantom of the Opera and Charlotte Church. By this time very tired already.... So we get ready to go home....

Then got one stupid incident happen when we were walking home... got a few blacks.. came to talk to me.. i mean.. talking as i was walking... serene was jus right in front.. then they were trying to 'get on' me... and i kept shying away... walking faster... and that guy was like,' i never tasted chinese girls before, what do you think? When can i meet u'.....

i was totally... uncomfy.. then wslked faster ... there was once or twice he kinda pushed me back on the shoulder... keeping me in step with him.. but i jus shook my head and walked off....

then i reached serene and told her.. she said she saw the blacks giving each other the 'looks' directing towards us, that's y she walked faster... then she laughed and said... ,' you always attract all these ppl hor'... i say ya lah... all the guys that are non-chinese or non-whites all come approach me!!!! DUN WAN also can.... sianz...

Leafie's Happy Ending

Thursday, March 09, 2006

10:10 AM

dear blog,

it's been a while since i've blogged. can't say i'm too busy with work, cause i'm doing none... i'm more busy with maple i guess....

i don't know. i just feel tired... not physically but mentally? u know? mountains of work been piling up and i'm still where i am 3 months ago...

french... improving..
php... struggling....
drama... pressurized until 4th april
dissertation... 0 movement

i keep putting off my work.. since x'mas.. i know its not right.. i know i really have to get a move on.. but i don't know where to find that energy and motivation...

but actually i think i know the answer to this question, but yet i've really got not the heart to do the 'right' thing....

My dissertation is due in 8 weeks time, and i'm still where i was 3 months ago... my motivation is that i'll be able to see my parents in 16 weeks time... but... if i don't get my paper.. i don't think i wan to see them(or have the face to see them)... and if i don't do my bloody dissertation.. i'm not going to get the paper...

clear as the blue sky... but i've lost that enthusiam since x'mas...due to the facts
1) i've put off working on my project
2) my supervisor has gone MIA
3) i'm too lazy
4) playing maple too much
5) watching films too much
6) tired and sleeping rather than working
7) concerned about my image/weight loss
8) thus affecting my health/ well-being

i know they all are excuses... but i'm still not doing anything to help myself... i tried to stop mapling... i tried to not too much films.. but everytime i open my bloody research .. i get stuck... like now... i'm blogging instead of working

Leafie's Happy Ending

Monday, February 27, 2006

1:27 AM

Dear me, its been THAT long since I wrote in this blog… hahha… anywae.. nothing much going on… still the same old lazy me.. not doing my work.. still playing games, chatting online… fed up with BGRs… (nothing good ever comes out of it)

Was inspiration last night.. and came up with some poems… I might as well post them here… hehe… show off my poetic skills.. hehhe

Be you foolish
Be you deaf
Why did you not heed me well?

Now you’re broken
Now you’ve fell
Would you try to listen well?

Stop your wailing
Wipe your tears
Dust it off and stand up well.

Now with clear eyes
Make a smile
In time it will all be well.

He had a bad name in his stead,
He had one that acts his stead.

He had set out with a charming grace,
He had moved with a turtle pace.

He had changed the name of game,
He had showed the hand of game.

Both so alike,
Yet so unlike.

He had won the heart of mine,
He had won the trust of mine.

That’s all I have this time.. I’ll post some other works I’ve done before… jus a couple… the rest are written in Chinese I think.. some song lyrics or something.. but they are in JB…

Leafie's Happy Ending

Monday, February 13, 2006

2:33 PM

i think i'm down with something again.. feeling feverish... and have abit of flu symptons... damn..

let's see what i've done last week..... i tried to reticfy an ongoing silent war between my two good frends... i've told A to be more forgiving and trustful to B, i've told B not to screw up the chance A is giving her... Then A and I was tokking about my faults, and how i would offend people unintentionally...

There was this one incident which happened in ... i think april or may.. before i came.. i went out for a forum outing... and then 2 of the forum members have insisted on driving me and A home.. so during the journey.. somewhere somehow.. i've said stuff i shouldn't have said but i have NO RECOLLECTION of wat was said.. but it didn't sound good or alright... My mum has warned me like 2 million times to change the way i talk.. because she feared something like this would happen...

and because i wouldn't listen or just didn't bothered too much.. something did happen... and i'm so guilty NOW that i've found out that i really did offend someone .. even when its unintentionally... i would never have meant any harm to anyone... i would have never INTENTIONALLY offend someone.. i try to be the peacemaker as often as possible...

anyway.. you can only wait for another chance to prove yourself worthy of being misunderstood... i'll be waiting.. and meanwhile, i'll be trying to monitor myself.. the way i speak.. the actions i do...

but i guess bad habits die hard, or rather the leopard never does changes thier spots. sometimes you jus can't please everyone.. but the least i could do is TRY pleasing most of them..

Leafie's Happy Ending

Friday, February 10, 2006

3:03 PM

Its been a really long day… I didn’t go to sleep til 7am in the morning.. waiting for maple to patch around 5am.. then I talked to Caren for abit before sleeping..

I woke up around 1-2pm I guess.. went mapling awhile before heading out for drama at 5pm.. I reached there.. and guess how many people came?? 4-5? Of us?? Waiting like idiots for the rest to come.. and there was nothing we could do because they were not the main characters… by 6pm.. the people started flowing in… and I got to do abit of act II before starting off reading lines for act III… overall.. it went well I guess.. considering I was alone.. save for the help david provided me…

Chloe and gemma said they couldn’t make it.. I guess chloe had placement or something… gemma TOLD us that she went home… (we’ll see)….

So I went home.. had a change of clothes and had some dinner before walking out to meet the others @ mood…. So I arrive there… planning to be like wowed… and have a good time… so I left the others to get a drink… I got 2 drinks in fact… when I came back.. no one was at the table… and they were at the door.. waiting to go to blu bamboo..WTH??? I’ve jus arrived.. and so I tried to take my drink out the door but only to have the bouncers stop me.. he said I’m supposed to finish my drink before I leave.. I CANNOT bring the bottle out of the premise…!!!! I had to finish it…

Then we reached blu bamboo… it was quite nice and all and we started to have a good time.. until I was tired and I keep getting off the dance floor to have breaks… and then michelle and serene were dancing … not alone… with 2 other guys… and I tot I was the hero going down to save them… and I pulled Gordon down with me…

I was wrong.. they didn’t wan the guys to leave… and the michelle stayed with her new ‘bf’ for a long …. Long…. Long…. Time… I gave up… and then serene was dancing on her own… and this guy was like touching her …. Dancing and all… I tot I could save the day again.. but it turns out she said it was okay… I gave up…. Really..

I mean.. I was the one trying to get everyone to go out tonight as a belated ‘celebration’ for Gordon… and that 2 girls mentioned above.. didn’t wanted to go… and ends up they are the ones not wanting to leave….OMG.. what have I done??

Michelle left with her French bf escorting her back home… serene dance till around 2plus when Karen came back trying to find chris, as he had abandoned steven once again.. leaving steven cash less to take a cab home.. I came out wanting to give him some money.. but he left already…

Oh.. I forgot one part… unless my president of drama has a twin sister… she lied to me? Us? I dunno… I mean.. I too didn’t go for one of the ‘sessions’ where they went to buy props… but at least I didn’t get caught… she said she was going home.. or did I hear wrong?? I might be abit tipsy and tired… but… I dun think I’ve recognized a wrong person… I dunno… its abit sad and hurt to have thrown all the job of blocking today… but I mean.. it is my job to direct.. but I tot directors have stage managers and producers aside them??

Aniwae.. I was thinking… was it me or what?? How come they can jus see a cute guy in the club.. (or not cute ones) and dance with them… and keep contacts and let them touch you all over? Wat is wrong with me? I admit I do flirt around.. but its nothing more than verbally and maybe a slight touching… but onli with FAMILIAR friends… I dun think I can do that to strangers… oops.. I forgot that one stranger I could.. but apart from that… I jus think its not right?? I tot I was open minded… maybe jus towards accepting things theoretically but not practically applying them

Leafie's Happy Ending

Monday, February 06, 2006

1:02 PM

4 days of mapling craze

Ever since I got my laptop, and settled down with it since last Sunday…. I tried to d/l whatever I needed for it… and then I d/l maple story on Wednesday…… I spent the rest of the week mapling away…. And seriously not eating not sleeping just mapling….

If my sister sees this, she’s gonna whack me… hahaha considering she IS my younger sister… I’ll be quite humiliating… hahaha but its good I’m back on Maple… I missed all my frends.. and some how … seeing them virtually is better than not seeing them at all… jus hearing voices when I make phone calls back…

Got in touch with my forum frends and rekindled several friendships… nice warm feeling…

Guess what.. I even influenced my school mates to start mapling… bengy first, then steven… now is serene.. HAHHAHAHA…. I just hope then dun start blaming me when they are crazed over maple and not work… hehehe

I just they wun be as crazed as me..

Sad & Happy Day

Story happened last week, but i was unable to post this....until now

I spent relaxing days with my best friend… I miss her so much… I was very very very overjoyed to see her again.

Day 1 – I reached kings cross around 3pm.. then I had to line up and change me train ticket..which I itchy hands.. brought wrongly.. I clicked that I had a young person’s card.. and I didn’t.. so the ticket will not be valid if I cannot produce that…

Then I lined up for the tube ticket… when I finally reach [High Street Kensington], whereby jiun’s hotel is (Tara Copthorne) I tried to figure my way to the hotel with the image of the map in my head.. when I stepped out of the station.. I searched for HIGH building (associate with hotels) …. (-_-“) all buildings there were HIGH/TALL.. I took a left turn.. and saw this building called ‘kensington close’.. I walked towards it… by the time I was halfway there… I was doubting myself.. I almost texted kah ming to come and help me find it… I finally reached that ‘close’ place.. and just to my left… was a huge sign – “Tara Copthorne Hotel” .. I started laughing… wat a genius I am… hahahaha

I waited for jiun at the lobby… and then.. I finally saw her!! I was smiling non-stop….we went to her room, changed and went out to bond street to do some window shopping… and when we were there… there was snow… yeah… not too much.. but it was really nice..

We walked our way to Chinatown and had Misato for dinner… with Kah Ming… we wanted to eat the Bar Ciao ice-cream.. but jiun was tired..(she didn’t sleep for more than 26hrs) so I brought her back to the hotel…

Day 2 – We had 2 choices for dinner.. ‘lau yu sheng’ with the SIA crew… or steamboat dinner with Agnes’ Sister @ hammersmith… we chose both..!!! haha

We went out around afternoon for another round of shopping.. I wanted to go to Carnaby street … there was a Roxy shop I saw when bing qiang brought me there.. I wanted to get something from roxy… a jacket.. a coat.. something… and in the end. I bought a pair of really coooool shoes.. for 39 pounds

We went to Bar Ciao today, intending to eat ice-cream.. we ordered pasta first.. and halfway thru the pasta.. we both were too full, the waitress told us they dun do packets… and we missed our ice-cream…!!!! My straciatella!!!

Then we went to back to skechers to buy jiun’s ‘dragon’ shoes… cos she saw a passenger onboard wearing it… so she fancied a pair for herself too… but the black one was sold out, the beige one didn’t have her size, she was left with the denim blue one…

We spend like 30 mins trying the shoe and deciding whether to buy it or not.. I was persuading her to buy.. but she keep hesitated… saying that it doesn’t match her BROWN wardrobe… then I gave up and said.. dun buy… she went to pay for it !!!

We rushed back to meet the SIA crew for their ‘yu sheng’ session @ constance’s room… we left early and made our way to hammersmith… then teresa welcomed us for a feast.. it was really nice.. and all the others were very warm and friendly too.. we had a blast… and I tot my new year celebration was going to be quiet and lonely… Teresa also told us tons of stories about her flight experiences and nursing stuff… really farnie… would really miss them…;)

Day 3 – Initially, we wanted to go to Chinatown for the parade and all.. but we were too lazy to change and go out in the cold.. so we stayed in bed… calling back to Malaysia.. and watched American Idol.. hehehe then we napped around 2-4pm… until I had to get up and leave for kings cross…

Jiun just sent me off to the lobby.. I didn’t wan her to spend money just to send me to kings cross.. I also didn’t wan to tired her as she will be working 12hrs back to sg…

Its really.. indescribable.. that feeling.. the sadness… not bearing to leave… and she actually had an offer to do a London flight again on the 2nd feb to 6th feb… but told her not to do it.. as it gets really tiring adjusting to the 8hrs difference time zone… I told her there will be a next time..

Leafie's Happy Ending

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

2:25 PM

Hehe.... abit happy.. didn't know got other people reading my blog.. I gave some of my friends the webby but I don't think they read it either.... ;)

I've always been reading those advice columns, scenario: I think I like the guy my best friend likes.. and I think he likes me too... So what do I do about it? Without betraying my friend.... I would look at these columns and laugh.. Never actually thinking much about it

I never thought this would happen to me... Cos the guys me and my friends go for are absolutely totally different.... ahem... until now... But I'm not exactly looking for a relationship... I dun think I like the idea of committing to somebody. Its a waste of time, effort, energy etc...

Or maybe its cos i think TOOOOO much on it.. Like I'll take a look at this guy, and then go, nah... age diff... goal diff... overall char diff.... NEXT. Its like I think I'm looking for just that one person which I think I can settle down with, the rest are just a waste of both out times and maybe we might just ruin each other's life if we are together for so long and ended up breaking up.

But life isn't THAT simple... The guy you think is the 'ONE', might not reciprocate that feeling... *bang wall* .... back to my original topic..

So, I don't think I'm going to do anything about that particular guy until he shows more interest... I don't want to ruin a good friendship over some guy. I mean, he won't even be here to stay... That's what I'm going to do....

p/s: that doesn't mean I'm going to stop flirting... hahahaha

Leafie's Happy Ending

Saturday, January 21, 2006

5:00 PM

Woke up at the ungodly hour of 615am... because today have to go PAINTBALL with Jon and frends.... didn't want to go in the first place... cause I found it tooooo ex.. 20 pounds for a whole day...

Aniwae I woke up... after only 3 hrs of sleep... dunno y these days not until 4-5am cannot sleep... then go ready and went out to meet them around 745am...

Mr Jon say can take metro to the place.. in the end there wasn't such a station called cramlington... we asked for directions and took a bus there... it was kinda like army camp... hahaha...

We got our gear, which consists of a VERY thin layer of overall, a belt(which i have no use of), a head mask (very important, a thing to load the paintballs....and a gun... then we were led to a map to 'fight' against another team... got scenario... then have to chiong and kill and shoot ... but my teamm.. hahahah alll stand behind behind.. those brave enough to go forward, all got killed... and i got hit by the paintball for the first time.... DAMN PAINFUL.... actually it was the second ball that killed me... the first one only deflected off... the second one hit my thigh... damn pain loh...

Aniwae, my team lost throughout the entire game... I kinda quit after half way thru the 3rd game(6 in all) reason being, my gun was stuck... I move to the side to get it fixed by the marshall... I got hit for no cause... so after I exchange my gun... I was coming back to the battle scene, I got shot, in the face... 3-4 times.. it hurt like hell, and because the mask got holes in it... I got my taste of paint too.. and I was too overwrought to carry on... I didn't die... you only die when you get hit anywhere below the head... I was just hit at the face... (ALOT of times)

I walked to the side, told the marshall I want out.. and I was out... I was crying on my way back... behind the mask... the pain was quite unbearable... so I quit.. I took my gear off and put on my jacket and kept warm till the others came out...

It was a nice experience I guess.. I've never won or killed in any previous war games I ever played in.. I realli think I'm not a hands-on type... more of a behind the scene type...

Now, I'm sitting in pandon building typing this, waiting to get home to change out of my stinking muddy shoes, socks and jeans...

Leafie's Happy Ending

Thursday, January 19, 2006

2:37 PM

I'm going to be meeting my BESTEST BESTEST BESTEST friend next week!!! its been so long... since.. 4th oct... 4 months? seemed like 2 million years... And she's the bestest ever, y? cos she is bringing my laptop, my health products, foodie.. goodies... hahahaha everything she can bring.. all just for me!!! I miss her... and I miss the others also...

I didn't want to think about them for the first 3 months.. I forced myself to not think about them.. cos I know if I think then sure will start to miss them one... And now... ever since I called my mum 2 weeks ago and chatted for and hour plus... I couldn't stop myself from dreaming I'm in JB again... I think I'm really really really homesick...But I can't go back yet, not without my Degree...

I was with Joanna last night till 3am... She was always that girl that lives round the corner, we took the same bus to school, didn't talk much cos of different circle of friends... even when we first came here, we never met up much. But after hours of working side by side... ahem, alright.. surfing online side by side, and then chatting til the wee hours yesterday... we kinda got to know each other better... Its really nice.. to know someone who is some sort alike you, i mean... been thru the same things... and its nice to have a listening ear once in a while. Thanks, babe.

So I came home from Jo's at 3am, Charlotte & Dani was in the kitchen.. jus chilling out after the night out... Charlotte wanted to see Roger's girl.. thats y she was waiting up.. and then she kinda invited me for pizza hut at half noon the next day... so I was like, alright :).. cos I dun really get to hang out with my flatmates.. I feel.. outcasted.. I mean.. we dun really talk about the same stuff, sometimes I have the urge to join them, but I dunno where my guts go... dunno where to start like saying.. let's get together and go out for a drink.. because when they are busy i'm free, when i'm not free they go out every other night....

Just haven quite blended in with them... i guess.. and i was abit disappointed when they cancelled on me... i forced myself to wake up, cos i slept around 6am... then i got dressed, make-up and all... cos they always make up.. so i tot to match them... but.. turns out.. when i went into kitchen at 1220... they were all in thier pyjamas.. saying they're not going... haiz.. i hid my disappointement and said i was going shopping.. so didn't matter...

i guess.. asians better stick back to asians.. and caucasians to caucasians...

Leafie's Happy Ending

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

11:58 PM

I've done a REALLY bad job ay my IS330.. and I'm not really giving a damn.. Its 60% of the whole coursework... I'll get realli low marks for this module but I'm gonna get high marks for the next one. Y? because my whole essay is on the next module: management of change!!!

Yesterday I watched KING KONG!!!! and I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE Peter Jackson...He's a genius, He's really good at doing what he does, making movies... its realli awesome! the gruesome parts are realli gruesome, the horrifying parts are HORRIFYING, the sad parts are REALLY SAD... he's just amazing... I'm re-watching it the moment steven gets me a copy... hehehehe

I'm supposing to be working on my questionnaires for these few days and supposedly to collect all my data by end of this month... and where am i ?? surfing the net... playing games...in short doing nothing with regards to my school work... hahaha!!!! gotta be more productive...!!! Leafie.. leafie...

Leafie's Happy Ending

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